Get Over Ex

As much as you tend to look up for the article “how to get your ex back”, I suggest sticking with the “get over your ex” routine!

I know one man who was the most mind twisted player I’ve ever met. Nobody thought that he would ever have a family (or even a long term girlfriend). Recently he got married.

I was very curious and called him asking him, “How?” His answer surprised me a lot…”Dating is like gambling; as soon as you start losing, just get up and leave the table and as soon as you hit jackpot, you’ll hear the sound and get all money. I hit a jackpot, my wife is the one. I wasn’t playing, I was just actively looking.” “Is she one of the multiple girls you went out with?” I asked him. “No, men don’t really like to go back…unless it’s for sex,” he answered with a smile.

If you call a man “my ex” it means that that relationship is over. It means it just didn’t work out. You can read all the “how to get a  man” books, lose 20 pounds, get a “Hollywood smile”,  learn Thai massage, belly dancing, Italian cooking and…it won’t work even if you‘ll have another chance with the same man. Don’t get me wrong, you really can get your ex back (it’s possible, it’s doable but it is not worth the efforts because if something didn’t work out once, it won’t work out again).

Here is a checklist of things that needs to be done in order to GET OVER YOUR EX:

1)     Switch your focus from him to yourself. Trust me if he deserved your attention, you deserve it even more. Promise yourself to focus on yourself for one month. I’m not talking about becoming selfish. I suggest you pay yourself the attention that you haven’t had since you met your former “prince charming.”

2)     List all the areas of your life on a piece of paper (except your private life): appearance, work, social life, personal interests, family, friends, etc. Decide what needs improvement

3)     Create a tight schedule for one month for all activities that had been missing and stick to it. Make yourself absolutely busy.

4)     Do not go on dates with any man for at least for 30 days. Yes, not casual dates, booty calls with other exes, no one night desperate stands. Nothing (there is an explanation in my book of why you should avoid it).

5)     Do not communicate with your ex for 30 days (even if he calls you and says that he realized all his mistakes and waiting for you on his knee with a ring).

Being attached to your ex is completely in your head and in your soul. You have to save all your valuable energy that you send in his direction, refocus, and do something productive and good for yourself.

If you think realistically when you think about your ex, you just marinade your past feelings that felt good before. This condition is dangerous for you because it’s addictive and you don’t want to be stuck in this for a long period of time.

Thinking of your ex won’t make you feel positive because the relationship is over and you can’t afford to feel negative. Why? Again, as I write in each and every article, because like attracts like and you need to bring positive people and events back into your life.

So follow the directions on the way to a new, happy, and exciting life. Do you want to have true love? Do you want someone really great and right for you to tell you the magical words “I love you, babe?” If so then you have to live for a while being that “babe.” Trust me, change your feelings and the situation will turn around as soon as you get over ex!

 

Mend Broken Heart – Good News, Read On

Has your heart just been broken…I have good news for you…it wasn’t your heart; it was that beautiful illusion that you created for yourself and believed in. It was a fairy tale inside your brain that you have been waiting to come true since you remember yourself being able to fall in love.

It feels good to create an illusion.  According to the dictionary, illusion is “something many people believe in that is false”.

You think about the man who happens to be so different from all your other unfortunate experiences and in your own mind every day when he makes you feel good, you “make” him more and more attractive.

In a while, he becomes so perfect that you even can’t see him as real anymore. Plus, you absolutely do not want to face the reality; you like your own creation because it’s so close to that Prince Charming we all have been waiting for since preschool.

Did everything start with that intense click that was more like electricity between you two? And now you are sitting and thinking about the dozens of sweet, flirty, sexy text messages and phone calls you enjoyed so much.

Do you remember what happened to you when he said the words you have dreamed to hear for such a long time? And, of course, you lost your sense of reality right away…

Do you remember the feeling of relieve we women have when we realize that the dating game is over and we can have the relationships…real, normal, happy, and healthy relationships we are programmed to have…Our society, grandmothers, and mothers did a very destructive job by telling us that there is nothing more important than to “live happily ever after”…

However, let’s face the reality now (if you would like to move forward to real inner happiness you have to face it anyway). This great, amazing Prince Charming was created in your personal video game of imagination and all pain you feel now is because the “game is over.” Your illusion is broken, your ego is hurt, and your most hated dating game is still in the near future (unless you would like to give up forever).

Meeting a real man who would be everything we dreamed about is like using the aircraft for traveling – we all know that aircrafts exist but very few people actually were inside.

However, we can’t fight our female nature and kill the hope of complete happiness…We have to just…accept the situation, do a mental inventory, convince ourselves to move forward and…actually start moving.

You should not let your heart be broken. You have to train your heart and grow it so big that when a break up will occur (and nothing lasts forever in this life, remember?) you will be totally prepared to give up the piece of your heart to this man. You should be able to give him not only the part of your heart, but also a lot of your love without any regrets and hesitations.

When you will be able to do that, you’ll become wiser, better, and most importantly a more experienced person who would deserve to be loved more and more each time this happen. Then, eventually when you are truly and genuinely ready to love, to share, to give without being selfish, the Universe will send you the one…who will save you from that “dating game” for the rest of your life! 

Mend Broken Heart – What Needs To Be Done?

Remember, YOUR HEART IS AS BROKEN AS YOU LET IT BE!

Have you ever thought about what EXACTLY “Mending a Broken Heart” means?

It’s very simpe. Think about what healing a broken leg means. Does it mean you can run again, wear beautiful hills, and have pedi with flowers? You don’t have to take painkilles, use a walker, and feel bad. You are almost there. This would be a RESULT of healing your broken leg. What would the processe? Well, to visit the doctor, place a cast, go through a healing rotine, and then start walking…slow, then faster, and only then run, dance in hills, and and wear the most seductive toe designs.

The same principles apply to mending a broken heart. Do you want to feel happy, enjoy every minute of your life, forget about a painful experience, meet your true love, and live happily ever after? Those are RESULTS. But in order to get your results, you have to go through the PROCESS of Mending a Broken Heart.

What needs to be done in order to Mend a Broken Heart?

1) You have to realize that you REALLY want to mend your broken heart. Do not smile sarcastically – I know people who just enjoy swimming in their misery because they get tons of attention this way. Their frends and family suddenly call them more often, bring them gifts, take them out, etc. As a result, a  heart-broken person suddenly gets showered with attention and even though she says that she “wants to get over it”, subconciosly she does everything to stay where she is.

2) You have to accept the fact that healing your broken heart is a process. It won’t happen overnight and will require your own work. You can have all the guidance in the world, but you have to do your work yourself. It’s like losing weight. You have to hire a personal trainer and a nutritionist, but YOU are the one who has to go on a diet and exercise.

3) You have to stop listening to “experts” who suggests that giving yourself a little time to cry, miss your ex, and eat comfort food for a while is ok. They use this trick to keep your attention because it will make you feel not guilty as well as give you an extra excuse to keep waisting your time.

4) You have to stop discussing your break up with friends and family because it brings you back to negative mood.

5) You have to stop doing everything that makes you think about your former love; watch love movies, listen to romantic music etc. You should figure out what brings you positive emotions and stick to this. If it’s comedy movies – watch them every day.

6) And the most important thing you have to understand is like attracts like – in order for you to get positive events in your life you have to find positive things in EVERYTHING that is going on in your life as well as in EVERYBODY who surrounds you. You have to accept the world the way it is and stop willing to change it.

I went through series of break ups till I figured out the formula that really works but the most significant case of broken heart took about 3 years to heal. Now two weeks is enough to move forward and accept the situation as a great experience. Remember, the more positive you will be, the better surprises life will bring to you. And guess what? The person who broke your heart is not your true love, he is just “training equipment” that you used in order to meet YOUR REAL TRUE LOVE.